Tuesday, 21 March 2017

Kyunki... Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi

I met my Mom-in-Law when I was 16. I mean, at that point I didn't know that she will eventually become my family. When I first met her, I was intimidated, for she appeared to be strict and hmmm... Bossy! She was managing two teenagers at home, with Uncle being abroad, and did an amazing job of it. So in my eyes, she was one of those strong and independent types. Later, I fell in love with her son - She didn't like it. I refused to back down - more dislike from her side. I went ahead and got married to him - more hatred towards me and finally became mom to her granddaughter!

Its been an year since all our differences have been sorted and I was finally accepted by John's parents. One year of being a Daughter-in-Law. I know for most Indian women out there, the role of DIL starts the very next second the nuptial knot is tied. For me, I had to wait for 5 years. And finally when I started the new role, it was as challenging and dreadful as for anyone else. But I think I am doing alright. I mean I can't say I have done a very good job, because I have my flaws and stubbornness. This means giving John some sleepless nights with petty fights over some of their actions and also being adamant for silly reasons. But, apart from all these hiccups, I would like to believe that we are doing well.

Coming back to my MIL, she is still one of the most strong and independent women I have come across in my life. And still Bossy :P. But, she is not what I expected her to be. To begin with, I don't think she hates me like I thought she did. She behaves to me just like old times i.e., when me and John were college kids. Uncle and Aunty have come down to stay with us twice and it was just like how my parents would be here. There were some differences of opinions and snide remarks but that happens with me and my parents too. 

Being a seasoned gardener, she helped a lot with my balcony kitchen garden and yes, she is my sole inspiration. When we talk over phone and run out of topics, there is always the kitchen garden that comes to the rescue. Then, she is this amazing cook and has the ultimate love for food over anything else (much like her Son!). This has made me think about taking cooking seriously. We sometimes even discuss her cooking experiments when she was of my age. 

My MIL likes to be seen as a strong woman. Hence tears and vulnerability is something I can never expect from her. I mean, I belong to a emotionally weak clan who cries at the drop of a hat. So a strong woman like Aunty is really a relieving presence in my life. She gives matter-of-fact advise and has a decent funny bone to her credit. 

So that's all for the Saas-Bahu saga in my life. Oh! forgot to mention that she is an avid fan of soap operas too and never misses a single episode of 'Manjurukum Kaalam'. :D

- Jane Doe

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